All the sorrys I never told

 ALL THE SORRYS I NEVER TOLD

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My face is as heavy as the largest dumbbell I could lift,
Of layers and layers like that of an onion in my kitchen,
Rugged, deep,torn but inseparable.
Peeling off would be difficult,
Causing wounds and scars.,

But today,
I wish to drop the weights and feel lighter,
Peel my layers and chop off the onions inside,
Sharp, straight, brutal and with all conviction.

I have a thousand sorrys to a million people,
Saved in a hundred piggy banks left untouched for years,
I am breaking my piggy banks
Of realising what a dungeon it made.

Here's a list of apologies clearing my debt:
Sorrys to being a bitch to some of you;
Sorrys to not being there when I had to;
Sorrys to those I spit my anger and mood swings on;
Sorrys to zoning out in betweens conversations;
Sorrys to being hurtfully honest;
Sorrys to not being empathetic;
Sorrys to being selfish;
Sorrys to being helpless knowing what's right;
Sorrys to being a nothing-of-use sometimes;

I am sorry,
For all that I am intentionally and unintentionally,
For the dumbbells feel like my own weight sometimes,
For the layers feel like my own flesh,
Rugged, deep, torn, inseparable
And unbelievable to me even.

I am sorry.
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@theinkedword
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